From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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