Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
