woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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