He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
