'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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