Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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