Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I love you. Go after that dick
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
