I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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