I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
