4 words: hood of his car
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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