Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
