This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
