If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Just took my morning after pill in the library
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
