You really coming over, don't trick.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Randomize
