we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
we're so committed to being not committed
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
