i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Dick very happy bro
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
