I wanna bring you to show and tell
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Randomize
