it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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