Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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