Michael Bay diarrhea
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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