don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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