Porn is love you can see.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
