It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
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