For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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