"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
