OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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