just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
