google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
