Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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