Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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