she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Randomize
