Apparently you make a good broom.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
