im gay
i know
yea but for you.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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