I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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