i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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