Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
