My hair reeks of homosexuality.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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