You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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