Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
