Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Randomize
