I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize