that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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