Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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