Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
