This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
