you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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