Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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