Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
