where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
