im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
