I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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