I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I love you. Go after that dick
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
